…and I thought turduckens were bizarre enough~ now there is a dessert version! This chocolate and vanilla layer cake is stuffed with an apple and a pumpkin pie! It’s called The Pumpple Cake and you can read about it here
At 1800 calories per slice~ it’s a cake fit for a glutton~ I’m a greedy bitch with a sweet tooth, but I’m not gonna eat that mess~ I want you to do it for Me. That’s right… I want you to order this cake for yourself (unless you’re lucky enough to live in the Philly area where the bakery is located) and trot on home with it like the fat piggins that you are. Ideally, you’ll have a webcam so I can enjoy the site of you displaying your debauchery.
I’ll want you naked, of course, and preferably hairless. I want you to sit indian style on the floor with the cake on the floor in front of you. At My direction, you’ll put the cake in your lap~ impaling it on your pathetic wee willy winky. Yes, that’s correct, you’re going to fuck the cake before you eat it.
Feel free to indulge in your own personal penetration style~ fast, slow, whatevs, I don’t give a fuck~ you’re a cake fucker and that’s all that matters. So, you fuck the cake. You fuck it some more. Then when you’re ready to blow your load in the buttercream, it’s face fucking first.
I want to see you do a face plant into that mess. Eat that creampie and show Me how much you love that sweet and savory treat. Anyone who consumes the whole cake will get a special secret prize. If you are interested in attempting this *Glutton For Punishment* task, contact Me